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That I identify as queer if you don’t really know me you may not know.

Individuals are usually astonished whenever they are told by me i date ladies, too, because we can “pass” as being right. We don’t have actually the stereotypical markers of queerness that many people look for in queer females: tattoos, short locks, rainbows and Xena (hey Haydee!), flannel shirt, etc. (trust in me, I tried the faux hawk thing and it also didn’t work with me personally!).

We identify as “femme” and We have and like it. My femme ness does not make me any less queer, radical, or feminist, because i will be working out agency to determine exactly just just what queerness and womanhood look and feel like for me personally. In addition, stereotypes that expect lesbian ladies become butch, and homosexual guys to be feminine further perpetuate heteronormativity and erase the required difference between sex identification and intimate orientation. An interest for an extended blog post.

Me access to certain privileges (cis and hetero ) as you can imagine, my ability to “pass” as straight and being seen as traditionally feminine give. Also it makes being queer only a little tricky from time to time, too. We usually find myself fixing individuals if they wrongly assume my orientation that is sexual myself in queer areas, and experiencing protective whenever my sex is challenged. Femme invisibility is real and I also encounter biphobia and internalized biphobia frequently. It’s been a journey learning the language and tools to enable myself to explore them.

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Being released, in my situation and others, is a continuing work each time I meet some body brand new, each time somebody makes an presumption or concerns my identification, we assess whether i do want to turn out. Do I’m safe? Do we trust this individual sufficient? Do I would like to participate in an extended discussion? Continue reading →

We defined as pansexual for the 12 months or more in senior school, however it never stuck beside me. We see increasingly more people distinguishing as pansexual, meaning you’re attracted all (“pan ”) people, regardless of their sex / gender identification. I’ve additionally met people who identify as fluid, heteroflexible/homoflexible, or choosing to not label on their own after all.

Q: whenever did you are known by you’re bi/queer?

I did son’t have the language to spell it out myself as queer until I became in senior high school. Growing up in Southern Korea, the idea of queerness wasn’t also back at my radar, however in retrospect, plenty of my youth experiences that made me feel “different” make feeling. Like, as a young youngster, I became enthusiastic about naked dolls (or are typical girls that way? I don’t understand) and I also always got chills (the kind that is good whenever my woman buddies touched my locks. Continue reading →